It's stress. Think about it. All day long you're probably stressing about your job, you're stressing about the traffic, you're stressing about your finances, you're stressing about the kids, then you go home and start stressing about whether you'll be able to help your partner get off. With all that stress, it's a miracle you can get an erection at all!
Stress does a lot of damage to our bodies as you probably already know. But besides raising your blood pressure (not in a sexy way), it can also reduce your libido. And that's not what you or your partner wants. Plus, if she's feeling overwhelmed by the pressures of life, you'll have a much harder time getting her to warm up and climax at all.
The combination is simply disappointing sex lives.
But it doesn't have to be that way. By finding ways to reduce your stress levels (and your partner's), you'll be able to find more fulfillment in bed and I know that's definitely something you'd want.
One way is to practice meditation. You don't need to learn any complicated positions, although it wouldn't hurt if you also want to become a little more flexible in the bedroom. All you really need to do is find a comfortable spot, close your eyes, and picture something very comforting. When I'm meditating, I always picture a garden of flowers because that helps me feel good. Don't picture your significant other while she may make you feel wonderful in lots of ways she's also probably going to make you feel stressed.
Make sure you can really picture whatever your image is. Make it so real you can feel it, taste it, touch it, and smell it.
You should do this at least once a day for ten minutes or any time you feel particularly stressed. The best part is that you can use a similar exercise to help you get ready for the bedroom. Instead of visualizing something that relaxes you, picture yourself and your partner in the middle of some hot sex and imagine her screaming your name in pleasure. Picturing this will not only rev up your libido, it will also give you more confidence in the bedroom.
Another stress reliever is a warm bath or shower. I could soak for hours in a bubble bath, especially one filled with aromatherapy bubbles. Sure, most people think relaxing in the tub is just for girls but guys can enjoy soaking, too. Just lay back so most of your body is enveloped in the water and close your eyes. The water will feel like warm lips or hands moving softly over your body. It's an incredibly soothing feeling.
Even better is taking a warm bubble bath with your partner. Both of you can strip naked and crawl under the bubbles with your bodies entwined under the water. You can either face each other or you can have her sit between your legs and lean back against your body. If you're a smart man and I know you are you'll choose the latter. Once you're both relaxed, your hands can start doing some exploration under the bubbles stroking her breasts, running your fingers along her inner thighs, even stimulating her clitoris a little with your finger or a waterproof vibrator. You could even use one of those shower head nozzles to direct water right onto her most sensitive areas if you have one handy. And don't worry, if she's half the woman you deserve she'll return the favor by giving you some special ways of relaxing even more.
After you've enjoyed some stress relief in the bathtub, you'll be ready to go even further in the bedroom. Don't think about your performance. Don't think about how long you need to last or anything like that. Concentrate instead on giving her all the pleasure you can. When she's feeling amazing, you're going to be feeling amazing.
Author : Gabrielle Moore
Resource : http://www.articlesbase.com